The River
What is this inner voice? Where does it come from? Can we trust it?
To me there is an energy that connects all things. In reality we are all one but we imagine ourselves to be separated. We imagine to be separated by bodies and we create an ego that supports the idea of being alone. Since what we experience is imagined it can of course never be true. Even though our mind has accepted the idea of being an individual our heart never did. Our heart is still connected to the energy that connects all things. Our heart knows all that has ever happened and all that will ever happen.
Our inner voice is a feeling. Does something feel right for me or not? Do I want to have dinner with a friend? Do I want to spend time with my family? Do I like what I do for a living? Simple questions that we can answer with yes or no. Making decisions could be so easy. A friend calls us and wants to know if we would like to have diner with him. We say whatever our heart tells us. We either go or stay at home.
If it would be just as easy. Because as soon as we get the call the mind kicks in. We feel like not going but our mind comes up with all these reasons why we have to go. It is a good friend of us and we owe this friend to spend time with him. Our friend might not feel good and we should be there to make him feel better and to support him. Or it is the opposite. We really want to go but suddenly remember that we have a bad hair day and that going out would make it hard to get up on time to go to work the next morning.
Either way we are not going with life, we are living the idea we have of it. When you listen to your inner voice for some time you will realize it is never wrong. If you go see your friend you will most likely have a terrible evening and realize you should have stayed home. What if you do not go out even though you feel like going? You might miss out on meeting the partner you have been looking for all these years. You might have met somebody who will help you to be more successful or you might just have had a wonderful evening. There is a reason why your inner voice told you to go.
A few years ago I signed a lease for an apartment that I could not afford. I was listening to my inner voice it was the right thing to do. All my friends thought I was crazy but I did it anyway. Six months later I had to admit to myself that I made the wrong decision. I could not understand what had happened. I knew I made an irrational decision but doing it anyway felt right in my heart. I met with my landlords and told them that I had to break the lease. I thought I was in big trouble. They were very sad that was leaving and instead of giving me a hard time offered me another place they had that was ideal for me and much cheaper.
Our inner voice does not always work in a straight line but is always leads us to what is best for us. That is most of the time not what our mind thinks is best for us. It might not mean that we will get rich and famous. It might happen but it is not its main concern. The mission of our inner voice is to bring us happiness and it knows where we can find it.
How can you live a life guided by your inner voice? First you have to decide what you want. Do you want what you think is right for you, society wants for you, your parents want? Do you want to listen to your head or your heart? Are you willing to go out of your safety zone? Are you willing to go into the unknown? You have no control over your inner voice. You will have no idea what it will come up with. It is not logical so you probably will piss off quite a few people who do not understand what you are doing. You will be in a scary, unknown, unstable place following it. Anything can change at any time.
The second step is practice. Follow it. Whatever it tells you, do it. Trust it. Know in your heart that it tells you what is best for you and that what you do will make you happy. This will not be possible all the time at the beginning but like everything else you will get better with practice.
One day you will flow with the river of life. There is no safety in that way of living, no ideas to hold on but a lot of joy and happiness.
The Flow. Subway tunnel, 14th Street and Sixth Avenue, Manhattan/New York 01-19-08 at 06:40 PM.
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