The Rocket
I just came back from Williamsburg to Lucy’s place, the apartment I housesit in Manhattan. I did not go out this weekend. Instead I tried to recover from last week. I slept until 11 AM today what felt so good. In the early afternoon I met my ex-girlfriend Brisha. We sat at Union Square in the park and just talked. It was good to see her. After that I took a yoga class and made my way over to Williamsburg.
The downside of having two places is that you always need what you have at the other place. I have my laptop at Lucy’s apartment but my desktop with all its power and the DVD burner in Williamsburg. I spent the afternoon to get the images I shot for Victoria’s Secret on Thursday processed and burned on a DVD. As usual it took longer then expected.
At the moment I feel like I’m sitting on a rocket at its launch trying to hold on. So many things are happening at the same time. Tomorrow I already have another shoot for Obliqsound scheduled, this time for Max Wild in collaboration with Sam Mtukudzi. I have to meet them at 10 AM in a recording studio while at the same time I have to try to get the DVD to the Victoria’s Secret Offices. I had a meeting with Michele the owner of Obliqsound and John Shannon last Friday. At the beginning of next month I will go to the West Coast for one week to shoot a music video for John. There are also a couple of other projects in the air.
Nobody ever said living a full live is easy. It is actually not. It takes a huge amount of effort. Being positive is one thing but somebody has to be there to get the images processed, carrying the equipment, built the set, shooting and write the invoice. At times it feels overwhelming. My life feels overwhelming because it is getting to big to be controlled.
In the past I had a very safe live. I was working as an assistant, reading books, doing yoga and going to the gym. That sums it up. This life was manageable because not much was happening. It was pretty much always the same. Working as an assistant was safe because I had limited responsibility. Reading books instead of going out was safe because I did not have to deal with the people I would have met. Yoga has a lot to do with control and going to the gym was always the same as well. My life was manageable; it was small enough that I was able to control what was going on.
That has changed. So many things are happening at the same time. Felling stressed about what is going on does not help either it just makes things worse. I have to let go.Fact is that I know that I can handle what life will throw at me. The part that is hard to get over is the not knowing. In the past I knew I could go to the gym or do yoga at a certain time, now I don’t. I never know what happens next. But isn’t that what life is really all about? Isn’t that living?
"The Rocket" Manhattan/ New York City/ Chrysler Building 04-20-08 at 01:25 PM
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